Keeping a diary of before, during and after meltdowns, shutdowns and sensory overloads, can help you identify triggers, which in turn aids you in making a Neurodivergents world more predictable and less scary.
It doesn’t need to be anything fancy. You could use a word doc, spreadsheet or pen/paper- whatever works for you.
You can expand it into all 8 senses to notice certain sensory triggers.
I’ve blogged in more detail on this.
https://ausomegirlsautieculture.wordpress.com/2022/08/29/pdaers-demands-and-how-to-avoid-support-it-pathological-demand-avoidance-the-tracker-diary/