Supporting your child and yourself.

Advocating in Meetings

The hardest thing to do is not be emotional, we often react on instinct and impulsively when we’re fighting to get our child/ young person (CYP) the right and legal support they’re entitled too.

Maternal/ Paternal instinct is often reactive especially when we feel pressured.

Always request more time to think about things you’re asked about-you do not have to make instant decisions.

I often get asked:

How do I advocate for my child/ young person?”

How do we get their voice heard?”

Before Meetings / appointments/ replying to emails, letters etc…

Keep emotions out! This is hard to do- find what works for you, I find Techno music helps me.


  • Write down exactly how you feel, swear if needed.
  • Leave- come back to after a few hours or days.
  • Tweak wording. (Professionally blunt)
  • Make a list of what you want to discuss.
  • Of what you want and an agreeable outcome.
  • You can lead the meeting if you feel able- don’t be fobbed off, or your voice not heard.
  • Take notes (these are yours, you do not have to share them).
  • Request any adjustments you need for meeting to be accessible.
  • Ask who you want to attend.
  • Does your CYP want to attend?

On Arrival to meeting (face to face)

  • Don’t be told where to sit- sit where you feel comfortable.
  • Breathe in, and exhale with long breaths.
  • Stay Strong: If you don’t agree with something, ensure it’s noted.

    During the Meeting
  • Find something that enables you to stay focused- I doodle in all my meetings.
  • Make names of the professionals attending and their roles- if they suggest something write it down.
  • If unsure repeat back what you think you heard, ask for clarification.
  • Don’t agree anything you’re not comfortable with – ask for time to process a response- even a few days.
  • Write down any actions agreed (incase they’re not on meeting notes.
  • Check they have the correct email address to send meeting notes to (your legally entitled to these).
  • Ask how long approximately until you receive notes.

After the Meeting.

  • Ensure you get a copy of notes any longer than 2 weeks chase).
  • Any inaccuracies-request via email (paper trail).

Requesting Reasonable Adjustments

All professional bodies, including schools must make reasonable adjustments under the Equality Act part 20- these must be anticipatory; must be in place prior to meeting.

  • Reasonable Adiustments are what you need, not what they offer.
  • It has to be suitable to your (or CYP) needs, not theirs.
  • EG Deaf- schools can access interpreters.
  • Failure for these being made puts them at risk of discrimination.